A Queen Never Folds to a Knight
Why I'm letting go of my princess energy…
The balance between the feminine and the masculine is a beautiful dance. Unfortunately, a lot of us walk around with deep wounds which is impacting our divine energy. There is a lot of wounded feminine as well as a lot of wounded masculine. Until we heal these wounds, we will not be able to be in our authentic, empowered, divine expression.
Who is the princess? (the wounded feminine)
The princess is the young maiden. She is innocent, kind but naive, and in many ways, weak. Why is she weak? It’s because she hasn’t matured, healed her wounds (these are often based on generational trauma she has inherited from her family and ancestors) and most importantly, she hasn’t connected deeply to herself. She has a lot of fear and doubt around her worthiness. Due to her lack of self trust and self connection, she is easily manipulated and taken advantage of by others. She often loses herself in relationships and believes in self-sacrifice. She doesn’t have healthy boundaries and often creates or contributes to a lot of drama. Her centre is not strong.
Most of women can relate to this maiden archetype. It represents girlhood in many ways. Yet part of becoming a woman is to graduate from the princess energy to that of a queen. Even though most women start off in this phase, it is not strictly related to age. You can be in your 50s and 60s and still have the princess/maiden energy and you can be in your 20s with the energy of a queen. If a woman stays in her princess energy it will be because she hasn’t healed her wounds or matured beyond what this phase represents. Sadly, some women never become queens. You can easily spot an older princess. They refuse to let go of the princess energy. Perhaps they think it keeps them young, but more often than not, it just keeps them wounded and stuck.
Who is the Knight? (the wounded masculine)
The knight is the male equivalent of the princess. He is often dashing, charming, handsome and playful. Yet, like the princess, he has not matured in himself and he has not healed his wounds. This means he can be unreliable and he is not able to hold space for the powerful divine feminine. The princess and the knight are the same in many ways. Knights are not secure in their masculinity. They have a lot of fear and doubts; feelings of not being enough. This stems from their wounding. Until this is healed they will have very little to offer.
A knight is prone to running away, much like the princess clings on for dear life. Both are driven by fear. In many ways it’s the dance of the avoidant and the anxious. Ultimately, the knight is running from himself and his divine masculine. There is a lot of shame underneath the surface. Feeling inadequate and being afraid to be rejected, abandoned and made a fool of, which would confirm his deepest fears of not being good enough. A knight is not secure in himself and is, like the princess, often swayed by others. In the knight’s case this can be more in the form of peer pressure, wanting to fit in and be ‘one of the guys’ and less in the form of being manipulated or taken advantage of.
Again, some men in their 50s and above are still knights. They have never healed and stepped into their king energy. This has to do with internal energy, not age. That can’t be emphasised enough!
Who is the Queen? (the divine feminine)
The queen has a very different energy to the princess. She has most likely been in the princess energy previously; now having graduated to a more secure energy. Again, the queen can be a young, beautiful woman (hello!) not necessarily older. It depends how much healing she has to do and when she manages to get this done by.
The queen has embraced her inner power. She doesn’t shrink or play small for anyone. She has developed self trust, rock solid intuition, powerful presence and inner strength. She knows who she is and she knows her worth. She won’t settle for less in any area of life. She stands in her power, yet she is still kind, gracious and peaceful. A queen demands respect and admiration. She plays the inner game and she plays to win.
“In every woman there is a Queen. Speak to the Queen and the Queen will answer.”
- Norwegian proverb
A queen never entertains wishy washy knight energy. It’s no longer a match for her. She will appear quite intimidating to knights, yet they have no need to fear as a queen really doesn’t have time for them.
Just because the queen is powerful, doesn’t mean she is masculine. She understands her feminine power. It’s a potent one. Divine feminine energy is creative, intuitive, receptive and nurturing. There is nothing more powerful than the creative force of a true queen.
Who is the King (the divine masculine)
The king is the queen’s masculine counterpart. He has matured and healed his wounds and insecurities. He is confident, secure in himself and his masculinity. He is steady, reliable and resourceful. Unlike the knight, he is not intimidated by the queen’s powerful feminine energy. Instead, he is inspired and motivated by it. He knows that the queen has the power to bring out the best in him, helping him to step into his greatest self. That is something very appealing to a king. More importantly, he knows he can hold space for the queen to shine and that this will not make him appear smaller, but rather, make him stronger.
“He who reigns within himself and rules passions, desires and fears is more than a king.”
- John Milton
The king is not interested in princesses. They don’t harness the feminine essence he is looking for. Again, the king can be a young man who has stepped powerfully into this energy. A king is unstoppable. He is led not by ego and fear, like the knight, but by integrity and inner strength.
There is nothing brutal about a king. He knows how to be soft when he needs to. He is not afraid of his emotions and his sensitive side. There is no need to run from himself any longer.
Who are you?
Now ask yourself: who are you? Do you recognise yourself in these archetypes? If you are at the princess or knight stage this is ok. I’ve been a princess energy my entire life (with elements of a powerful queen though) and I always found myself attracted to knights.
Now that I have stepped into my queen energy, I find knights unappealing. Sometimes I can still feel remnants of that princess energy within myself. It’s dying a steady death as my inner queen emerges.
The thing about being a queen is; I would never entertain a knight now. If no king appears, I will rule my own kingdom. Because yes, a queen is powerful. Yet she’s even more powerful, when she has a king by her side, because then, she can bloom and blossom in all her glory. That’s beautiful.
Becoming a Queen
This is the time to step into your queen (or king) energy. Do the inner work to heal your wounds of unworthiness and release your insecurities. If not now, when? Start today. Seek out support if you need to. Don’t hold onto the princess or knight energy beyond its expiration date. It’s not honouring the truth of your being. Everyone is cheering for you. Now it’s your turn to cheer for yourself.
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This was such an amazing and enlightening post! I recognize the princess from my past and hope that I am getting closer to becoming the queen with a little steadfast work! The knights have never lured me and have yet to find a king…so for now I rule my kingdom with a humble heart. Thank you for so eloquently pointing out the different traits that make it easier to grow towards my chosen path!
What an uphill task, but worth taking up. Your posts exuberate inspiration and induce strength to take a leap in the direction where we may find the more awakened version of self. Simply beautiful, Hege.