It's Time To Get Rid Of Labels
Why you shouldn't reduce yourself or others to a label
We are all guilty of it. We identify ourselves with labels and judge others by theirs. Yet is this serving us? Let’s examine the deeper underlying reasons why we do this and what might be a better solution for us individually and collectively.
The Love of Labels
Why do we feel so drawn to labels? I believe it’s for many reasons. We all strive to understand ourselves and the world around us. We have also historically been tribal creatures. We long for a tribe to belong to, we want to know who is on our side, who can be trusted and where we ourselves fit in. When we label ourselves with a belief or affiliation to something outside ourselves, we can easily feel a sense of belonging and a form of identity. I am this, I belong to that. It also signals to other people what we stand for and believe. This is not necessarily a bad thing and it’s innately human in many ways.
Knowing Me, Knowing You
By identifying ourselves and others through labels we give ourselves and others a sense of knowing them. Everything becomes very generalised and stereotypes start to form. If someone shares one or more of our labels we are open to those people in a way we wouldn’t be otherwise. In many ways it works as a filtering process. Again, this can be useful to find likeminded people, however it is also massively reductive. We project onto each other characteristics based on the labels we have adopted and those we have rejected. Just as we open ourselves up to strangers who share our labels, we close ourselves off to those with opposing labels to our own.
Judgement Day
When we reduce others to the labels we have rejected we strip them of their humanity. We focus solely on what separates us and how different our beliefs and values must be, instead of trying to get to know what drives someone else. Who they are beyond that label, their strengths, their weaknesses, their unique story. We miss out on so much.
We judge them prematurely before we have even gotten to know them. We all do this, myself included, yet we should always aim to focus on seeing someone’s humanity, to understand who they are, what they believe in, what’s important to them and where they are coming from. We must remember that when we so harshly judge others, we ourselves are also being judged.
What Unites Us
Ultimately, labels or no labels, I believe there is more that unites us than divides us. It’s easy to lose sight of this when we get too caught up in labelling ourselves and others. We are all human beings who long for freedom, safety, love, belonging and opportunities to create the life we wish for ourselves and our families. Anything else is simply psychological and emotional wounding and misunderstandings for the most part.
Drop The Label
You can agree with something without overly identifying with it. To seek common ground it can be helpful to not lead with a label when meeting new people. Don’t focus on yourself so much, trying to establish yourself in the eyes of other people. Lead instead with curiosity for other people. This world is full of amazing, interesting, fascinating and talented people. If you discard people simply based on a label they identify with, which doesn’t resonate with you or opposes your personal views, you miss out on so much!
Labels are for jars, not people
- Paul Jarvis
It’s not so important that we all have the same labels. What’s important is that we don’t vilify, judge or discard others prematurely simply based on a label before we have gotten to know them. We should aim to understand, not judge. It’s certainly easier said than done for all of us, yet we must strive for better.
Labels may unite us in some ways, but they also divide us. Let’s be mindful of how we label ourselves and others and ask ourselves: does this really serve us?
We must remember that what we give our attention to matters. If we focus on what separates us, we are fuelling more division and separation. Instead let us drop the labels and focus on our common humanity.
Ask Yourself
Now it’s your turn. Ask yourself how you label yourself. Is this serving you? Remember that what you focus on and identify with will expand so it’s wise if you are determined to label yourself, to do so consciously and to make sure that whatever labels you give yourself are empowering you, not reducing you. You get to decide who to be.
Secondly, how are you labelling others? What labels do you reject and are you brushing off people based on those labels? Is this serving you? Could it be that you are missing out on understanding others more deeply and rejecting interesting and wonderful people just because of a label? Reflect on this and let’s all aim to do better!
We’re all just walking each other home.
- Ram Dass
Label or no label. We’re all a soul in bodily form.✨
Get a FREE copy of my eBook “Silence & Surrender”
Thank you for reading! 🙂
If you enjoy my work consider becoming a free or paid subscriber to support the publication.
✨ Free subscribers get access to all my new posts
✨ Paid subscribers get access to all new posts as well as the full archive!
✨ Save 25% with a yearly subscription for £45/$57
✨ Get a monthly subscription for £5/$6.5
Good morning Hege. I use labels way too often and it’s simply laziness. Thanks for the reminder to evaluate someone based on their actions, more so than the assumed motivations behind those actions.
What a fascinating piece Hege, and one which resonates. I've often used the phrase myself 'Labels are for garments, not people!' Yet been guilty of labelling myself too! I think as humans we find a comfort and safety sometimes behind our 'labels'. However as you say, by doing so can hold us back and restrict growth. Thank you for a truly thought provoking piece ☺️